Oh no another bad week of business as the nation is besotted by the England World Cup progress as we march onto to another triumph.

I know this is not a universal opinion but I thought there was big improvement in the performance yesterday – real signs that the team is taking shape. Of course, there is plenty of room for improvement.

Not sure that Rooney’s best position is as a striker but he did enough to suggest that he can grow into this new role.  He caused enough problems to give opportunities to the support cast of Lampard and Gerrard – it is a pity that they did not bring their shooting boots with them!

In defence Paul Robinson still looks shaky when called upon to catch centres but I still have faith that he is the best goalie we have. Well, Owen Hargreaves was a revelation (again) and not so sure we should replace him with a fit Neville! Ferdinand and Terry had their moments but looked solid in the 2nd half. Another storming match from Ashley Cole too!

Where art have you been dear Carrick? He was man of the match in my opinion, and I hope Sven does leave him out yet with another permutation. His passing and vision was brilliant. We cannot afford to drop him!

Lampard, Joe Cole, and Gerrard had poor games. When they are firing on all cylinders we will be a force – and they will need to be far more productive against Portugal.

Captain Beckham – yes, he scored a magnificent goal- but I still doubt his overall contribution to the team. First I do not see him as a captain – I would much prefer John Terry – who I feel would demand more on the field. Second Beckham is limited to delivering free kicks, corners and passes. I know he has delivered more passes than anybody else in the tournament but then he takes all the set pieces it is no surprise. Through the sheer volume he has to deliver some good balls. Lampard, Cole, Gerrard and Rooney could all take free kicks/corners and I am sure they would deliver! I am sorry Becks but I think you should bow out and let Lennon cause problems for defences. Lennon would deliver more crosses than Beckham as he has the ability to beat people with his skill! Unfortunately , I do not see Sven making such a change and Lennon will remain an impact player!

Roll on Saturday with Deco and Costinha out through suspension, we have a real chance to progress to the semi-finals!

Well we are through to the next round! But what a struggle? Surely our performance must improve? Otherwise I can see a quick exit from the competition. Well that is not all bad news then – the property market is dead! We hope it is due to the nation’s interest in the competition.

With Michael Owen out of the competition, and a half fit Rooney – where we do go next? Walcott seems to have been a mistake unless Sven is keeping an ace up his sleeves, and he will unleash him in the next round?

Perhaps we will play 5 in midfield with Rooney up front, and bring on Crouch when he tires in the second half. I thought Owen Hargreaves played quite well in a holding role so we can assume he may keep his place with Beckham (although I would like to see Lennon given a chance), Lampard, Gerrard and Cole making up the numbers. This formation would allow Lampard and Gerrard to attack. Lampard must get one shot on target soon!

One of the most worrying aspects was the fragility of our defence from set pieces. Bring back Ferdinand, Campbell seemed to be off the pace. Hopefully, the coaches can rectify the  marking before the next match.

I still believe we can beat Ecuador but will we go much further?  Realistically no unless we can find some fluency and pace in attack. Oh well, at least business should be picking up soon then!!

Good luck to our lads as they fly off to win the World Cup! Notice the immense optimism! After thumping Jamaica – of course, we can win with our new super striker Peter Crouch. Can this be the same striker who went half a season without scoring a goal? Who needs Wayne Rooney anyway!! If you believe the Press we can win the tournament – did I see a pig fly past? No it was just 2 jags Prescott on another freebie.
No doubt reality will strike on Saturday – England are notorious slow starters at World Cups so we might struggle to gain points against Paraguay. We will beat T & T in the next, and I am sure T & T will be on the plane back home pretty quickly with their G & Ts. Sweden – how long since we have beaten them? – well too long for sure. I suspect we might draw!

From there on, it will be plain sailing to the Final – Wayne Rooney will appear as a substitute and score a hatrick! Sven will then have to decide who to play: legs eleven Crouch or Mickey Rooney. David Beckham will have been red carded and will have to miss 2 matches. Sven will then be playing 4 1 3 3. Owen Hargreaves in the holding mid-field role; Lampard, Gerrard and Cole in mid-field and our 3 Galacticos: Crouch, Rooney and Owen up front.

Who will we play en route to the Final? France, Germany, Portugal, Brazil. Really nothing to worry about is there? In the Final we will win 4 -2 against the Germans – deja vu or a dream?

Read twice……

Outside a Paris dress shop: Dresses for street walking.

In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front
desk.

Yes – the French do close their estate agency offices over Easter and they are closed on Sunday!
Yes – there is chaos at the ferry ports – should I check to see if the ferry is going?
Yes – they do close for 2 hours at lunch but why cannot I be the exception and be shown around at lunch?
Yes – France is a larger country, and it does take time to drive from one location to another. The agent will not mind if I turn up late – will he?
Yes – if I shout loud enough they will understand me!
The agent will pick me up from the airport?
How many English live in this village?
What do you mean there is no mains sewerage?
Where’s the nearest pub?
Do the French play French cricket? Why not?

Email received talking about “sceptic tank”.

Is this the French Sewerage system when you are not sure what the toilet arrangements are?